Monday, December 19, 2011

Baby OUT!

I was scheduled to be induced yesterday.... it did not go well.

The week leading up to the induction, there were grandiose thoughts and ideas that baby would come on her own and in true "Megan's child" fashion, make a grand dramatic entrance. Maybe my water would break at work? Maybe I'd suddenly go into labor at the company Christmas party? Maybe my water would break at my friend's Holiday party the night before my scheduled induction?

No dice.

So we resigned ourselves to the idea that she would come with a little nudging from the doctor. But that there would be drama somewhere in the labor and delivery process.

Instead we learned that this kid is of the "plant the seed and wait 6 mos for fruition" school of thought.

You know the kind. The conversation typically looks like this:

"Hey, you know, you might want to think about coming out now. We have a pretty cool room for you, and lots of cute clothes and I know it's warm and cozy where you are, but don't you think it's a bit crowded? Wouldn't you like some fresh air? Totally up to you of course....I was just sayin'"

Her: Blank stare, blinks a few times.

You: Just something to think about.....totally up to you. Though you might really enjoy coming out and being out of there......so......

 This all has to be said with as little interest or enthusiasm as possible and then back away slowly, make no sudden movements. If she catches even a hint that this idea is what you want, all bets are off.  You have to plant the seed, and then wait for it to become her idea.

I should have started the eviction process with this kid before we hit the second trimester....how stupid am I?

At the rate I'm going, I'm going to have the gestation period of a friggen' elephant.....

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